The mindset behind all relationships should have an underlying positive attitude as this would form the fundamental components of these relationships and guide the creation of our love to-do lists.
Why is it difficult to keep positive connections with our partners?
- First off, these often take some getting used to, especially with the constant barrage of difficulties we encounter on a daily, it is often challenging to uphold the vows of being kind, loving our spouses no matter what, and, most importantly, sticking to the commitments we both made to value and cherish one another.
- Another unfortunate reality why it is difficult to maintain positive connections is that when things go wrong in our relationship, there is a downtime in communication and things fall apart. In the heat of these moments, we tend to forget our spouse’s positive qualities even if this isn’t always deliberate.
If we ever find ourselves in such a precarious situation where connection seems lost, rather than saying nasty and hurtful words that can’t be taken back or even being confrontational with our spouse; verbally or physically create to-do lists.
3 steps on how to create love to-do lists?
- First off, kindly get a pen and paper or preferably your diary in that bad mood you are in and write out a sort of reminder, listing why you love them as a partner, we call it the “love to-do” list.
- Also, take some time to write down how your partner has helped you throughout the years, what you like and dislike about them, or even better, what is currently driving you crazy.
- Take some time later in the day or right before bed to read what has been written; we’ll feel much better for it, have a broader perspective on things, and be more appreciative and accommodating afterward.
Note: It’s advisable to have a Love to-do list even when everything is going perfectly, as you don’t have to be angry before you write one.
Hinged on the idea of being accessible and simple to utilize as a resource through trying times. The list would serve as a tangible reminder and an appreciation tool when anger floods your emotions beclouding what a wonderful spouse you have.
You could even care to share some items from your list with your significant other at a later time. You might either put it in a note and hand it to them or send it to them via text. It is always good to let them know they are loved and even better when it is well defined.
Do this often and watch your anger dissipates as you rediscover renewed love for your partner and how to love them better.